“Our basketball team will slay them this year!”
“The management only cares about the bottom line. It is up to the union to teach them how to treat employees right.”
“Can you see those people filling up the front rows? They get to sit there because they have special needs.”
We engage in this type of talk all the time without much thought. We are always talking about “us” and “them.” On the one hand, it is only natural to differentiate in this way. We use categories to sort and arrange and to describe how we fit in to the grand scheme of things. Categorization makes it easier and faster for us to navigate and orient ourselves in the world. However, if we are not careful and carry the categorization to an extreme, we may engender an “us-versus-them” mentality, a divisive mindset entrenched in our daily experience. According to the American Psychological Association, the us-versus-them mentality is “the tendency of individuals to view the social world in terms of an ingroup (‘us’) and an outgroup (‘them’).”[1]
We often place people in different, hierarchical categories. Worse, we treat them accordingly. This can be problematic when
- We assume that, because people belong to specific categories, they are foes.
- We indiscriminately ascribe certain characteristics to individuals within the same category.
- We incorrectly project negative traits onto a certain group of people because of outdated stereotypes.
People generally prefer associating with those with similar backgrounds or views over those who are different. Such a preference often leads to competitive tendencies. When the us-versus-them mentality is carried to an extreme, it may lead to hostility and even alienation.
An us-versus-them mentality is ingrained in our society. We see it playing out in various aspects of our daily lives – between different age groups, marital statuses, races, political affiliations, religious beliefs, income levels, abilities, parenting styles, etc. If someone feels differently about a subject, the tendency is to assume that person poses a threat to our view.
Unfortunately, such a mentality has infiltrated churches too. Many of us are uncomfortable with those who dress differently, act differently, or talk differently. We feel annoyed with those who speak loudly in the church lobby. We give a dirty look to those who make sudden, unpredictable movements during church service. We pretend not to see and avoid interactions with disabled individuals by separating them from mainstream gatherings or excluding them from certain activities. Deep down inside, many of us still have a stereotypical view of people with disabilities. We focus overly on the differences between people with disabilities and “normal” people, rather than what we have in common, fostering an attitude of embarrassment or even fear.
People tend to avoid differences. They see differences as a negative, a liability, something to be avoided. This tendency sets the stage for discrimination, exclusion, and even isolation. Most unfortunate, it dismantles connections and relationships among different groups.
How boring and plain would this world be if we all looked the same, thought the same, acted the same, and talked the same?
Conformity suffocates creativity and crushes the human spirit.
Humans are created to be different. Diversity is part of God’s ingenious design. Difference among people is needed for society to progress and flourish. It broadens our perspectives, enlarges our views, and expands our reach to people. Instead of seeing differences as something to be eliminated, we can see our differences as an opportunity to share, learn, and grow.
Jesus’s view of people is one of love and equality. And He expects His followers to have the same view.
If we see people with disabilities as “others” who are naturally opposed to us and our ways, we need to change the way we see them. We need to see them as “one among us,” sharing the same humanity.